I built this cat door for the porch window last night… i dropped $30 at Home Depot …technically this probably cost $20….it’s a surplus piece of that beaded masonite and the plastic top parts from plastic outdoor lattice…and a bit of clear plexiglass attached with duct tape so it swings in and out…. it’s propped open right now for the cats who haven’t figured out the sway part…but i have a wider piece for later…where they can get in but not get out….i had to do something the damn little dog fits through that opening…the chihuahua does to…but he’s not inclined to go out and chase possums at night. I was very pleased with my life for about an hour… well maybe two hours.
The weather has changed in New England…we made a jumpstart to September….and i am highly suicidal…. regardless of the calendar…we track time by weather here…. summer is over…i owe the mechanic $400 for repairing the 19 year old truck, i lost the rights to reprint two local books that I had already prepped for publication, (local heirs to a local dead person), and the census is wondering why i am not putting more ridiculous miles trying to close the last empty house cases…yeah right like that’s gonna happen. And I am sure the gas and electric company haven’t forgotten about me. It was my intention to work my ass off this summer to clear those bills, but alas..i only worked my ass off to pay for the cost of working my ass off. I can’t even calculate how much ‘EXTRA’ money i spent on that job…Sunglasses, shoes, new clothes from the thrift store, nto to mention all the gas, oil, and dunkin donuts products…and blowing through all my phone and dataplan minutes over and over. i don’t want to do the math…it will just make me sadder. But since i am already at the bottom of the hole, i decided to go out swinging… for a week i had been putting together a ‘letter’ in my head to whatever mucky mucky is in charge of this cockamamie thing, and i finally sent it out this am. well i sent it as an email to the highest name on my email list. outlining the bait and switch tactics used to hire field representatives..i would have never in a million years applied for a part time job 35 miles away from home. it just turned into something i wasn’t prepared for and i feel ill used…..over the last 52 years, i have honed my talent for passive aggressive manipulation which i inherited from my mother..thanks ma. So i pulled out all the stops and threw myself on my sword multiple times, apologizing my inadequacies and so forth… who knows if anything will come of it…but i did actually like the JOB part of the job, just not the logistics of doing them. and i wouldn’t want to miss out on doing it again in the future…cept LOCALLY.
So my brain has already checked out of that job, I just can’t get motivated to invest any more time, since its already broken my heart and truck. When the suicidal depression has taken hold…driving through all those beautiful upper middle class towns didn’t actually help my mood either…. I try to fight it off by sticking my head inside the computer and work my fingers to the bone even if it is a complete waste of time…the actual WORK part is what convinces the brain that it is WORKING..even if no money is forthcoming…and since my brain needs something to play with…i worked on more WordPress apps and plugins..trying to learn more about Search Engine Optimization and adding more commercialization options to the website i already have…so what does my childish brain DO? it starts another damn website. YEAH like i needed that…to be more accurate i DID go through all the domains and such that i had on the drawing board and erased all the clutter, EXCEPT for this one, Sicpress and the new one… I bought that ecommerce plugin WpZonBuilder for about $66 bucks and what it does is extract amazon products to set up Amazon affiliate sites.. basically selling stuff FOR amazon hoping that the trickle down theory will make it worthwhile. he…i already make about $12 every month from SOMEPLACE on the internet where i recommend something..i don’t exactly know where…so why not TRY it….it IS part of my overall plan for Passive Aggressive money that i talked about last year. So perhaps i need to put my fingers where my mouth is.
That’s what it looks like right now… i am still not happy with it, but every time i twist it around i DO learn something. I decided to combine my fascination with podcasts and the associated products on amazon… granted I made it way more complicated than I guess the wpzonbuilder had intended it to be…instead of just adding thousands of products at once – which i take it, is the way it is SUPPOSED to be used, I have been added 3 here and 5 there, adding direct links to my favorite podcasts..granted no one has visited the site but me but that’s okay, like i said i am still fucking with it.
The other aspect that i am LEARNING while doing, is about SEO which is how the internet works these days. In the bad old days of the internet – you created a site and waited and hoped that the search engine bots would find you and index you..these days people smarter and more determined than you or eye, manipulate their pages and websites to get Google to do exactly what they want. I’m not that clever, i can only learn from doing, i can’t INTUIT the best ways to draw attention to a site where i am selling things I don’t have. The best I can do is spend hours late and night and into the wee hours curating the best crap from around the internet. I figure in the end i can spend about 5 hours a week loading posts onto it. but like this blog, I consider it ALL LEARNING for the future.
I have since turned around and started adding Search Engine Optimization to Sicpress.com and hoping that i can pull that website off the mat where it is lying in a pool of its own blood.