meet the new year, same as the old year – buckle up.

I never bother with resolutions, I know myself too well. You should know by now that I am an untrustworthy and lazy sort of person. If resolutions came with penalties for failure then I’d be interested. But if there is no carrot and no stick, what’s the point? At this point in my life I only do what I have to and if I don’t have to it’d better be fun. But what the hell – I will give it a go.

I resolve to try to read more books that I should have read before now. I took a gander at 1001 Books You Should Read Before You Die, granted I have read a lot of them already, but the book is 2.5″ thick and weighs 5 pounds, if I finished reading IT before I died I’d be impressed. However, I think I can managed another page a day on top of what I am reading now, I’m doing pretty good keeping up with the Pepys Diary and the Thoreau Blog, so maybe I won’t find a book through Daily Lit to overwhelming.

• I resolve not to be surprised when people don’t do their jobs well. In theory this shouldn’t be all that hard, but perhaps it is because I always live in hope I find it so. Tonight I ordered the Stuffed Portabella Mushrooms off the special menu at ‘my’ restaurant tonight. What was I thinking? I know they can’t really cook. Yet I ass-umed and got served slimy fungus underneath a mountain of feta and spinach. When I sent it back the guy who overcooked it came out and I tried explaining that mushrooms were 90% water but his face went blank. Oh joy.

• I resolve to double check the conditions of books I order from vendors I don’t know. Sounds simple no? but yet, when I need a common 10 dollar book, sometimes I forget and don’t read all the way to the bottom of the description, to the part where it says – ‘missing both covers’ or ‘dropped from 30 story building’ or ‘ found in a dumpster inside wet bin liner’. Is it me? or has the internet just become a place where people recycle each other’s garbage?

“Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.” ~Mark Twain (thanks alan)

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