needs and wants

IMG_0482This morning was exactly like most mornings, the money didn’t magically redecorate my life with rainbows and glitter.  So much for the  first day of being back amongst the middle class? or is that pushing it?  hey..let me enjoy my fantasies…I still had to scoop the litterboxes, and find the vomit puddles, pack and ship my piddling little orders that net me about $3 each.  My income is still in the shitter so that’s the 1st thing that needs to be addressed. After yesterday’s bout of throwing money at problems to make them go away… all the utilities are paid up, the mechanic is fat and happy..but to be accurate he was already that way….now i have to feel guilty every time i press that Buy Now button.  I cranked out a 5 or 6 invoices for new product and realized i had forgotten to order the table top lighting set up for product images – so i had to spend an hour researching THAT to make sure i was spending the money wisely.

The odd thing is that after I cleared the absolute must haves off the list, there were still more NEEDS on the list.  i’m starting to get weirded out again.

IMG_0463I went a little overboard at Home Depot and aside from the clear boxes, i didn’t buy anything i don’t normally buy, i just bought them all on the same day. MY idea of  frivolous spending on myself was to buy a pair of used shoes off ebay and some summer clothes at the salvation army.   At the electrolux shop, I got a new hose for the 49 year old vaccuum…and a bin at home depot to put all the vaccum bits into…and i splurged on a tool box with wheels, so i can get all the old tools out of the kitchen cupboards…isn’t that where everyone keeps them?

Aside from the tabletop light set up,  The only new thing i have bought so far is the television, i ended up finding the camera i wanted used, which freed me up to buy the videocamera i wanted USED of course.

As for big ticket items, I also paid for a dumpster for the week at the wildlife sanctuary, where the REALLY needed it. Trust me. ANd i finally put cash in the hand of the guy building the websites.  It was a substantial amount, and i am very jealous that i don’t have the skillset he has, but then i’d have to have clients like me, and that wouldn’t do.  But I look at it as a NEED the biggest need.  I need to start bring money back into the house.   If i stop and add everything up i’m going to start to get very very nervous.   I mean it doesn’t sound like much to you, but 200 here and 300 there, adds up…buying used shoes and clothes isn’t making up for the outflow.  Argh….damn it.  and I haven’t got my damn hOUSE yet.  I am so worried that i will keep spending like  drunken sailor.


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