shiny pages

eggs in tomato Breakfast…my punishment for yesterday, is that i have to go back to cooking for myself, so lunch will be more sardines and avocado.

Yesterday started off pretty awful – I didn’t exactly loose track of time, I knew it was monday, but I woke up with my right ear acting wonky again, so i was already disoriented. I read several email mixed messages from friends which led me to think i was due at the Animal Rescue Clinic. They asked if they needed my shift to be covered and what animals i was bringing. It was the third monday of the month which after 4 years on that day, not an unreasonable assumption So I packed my dead cousin’s cat into a carrier, scooped up the chihuahua, and took the truck up the highway, only to discover that my mechanic and I, forgot to unplug something under the hood which meant that i had to get off the highway almost immediately and go the long way overland making me ridiculously late. Once i got to the clinic and realized there was no spay/neuter clinic today…so i made a phone call, had a good scream and cry sitting in my truck, the cat had been screaming and crying the entire way anyway…then put more gas in the truck and came all the way back. The upshot of that miserable morning was that i consumed, two boston creme donuts, and ordered a pizza delivered JUST because i wanted the 2 liters of coke that came with it. Yes, i knew all those things were bad, but i didn’t care. I ate them, i felt better, that’s how shit works.

I needed the coke to wash down the migraine meds, as it seems that’s the only way they work on me. And i don’t drive the truck around in the day with that rejection sticker. Neither does anything for the middle ear problem, that just has to go away on its own. But the day got better after i wrapped myself back up in socks and sweats and the migraine went away. I know that its because i need new glasses, but i still have paying work to work on regardless of my eyesight. I did get a couple of checks in the mail for paid work, and when the sun went down i dropped them in the bank’s night slot and then dropped 90 dollars at Home Depot on cleaning supplies. All of which made me happy. I felt so good that the rest of the pizza went in the dumpster for the squirrels. Not all take out pizzas are good the next day anyway.

captain_januaryAlso in the mail came an 1895 copy of a maine novel by Laura E. Richards, the author of Captain January, remember the Shirley Temple movie about a lighthouse keeper? I sat down to read some of the book and what became radiantly clear was  how much i will need subordinates to do shit for me going forward. In 1895 some pretty little books had shiny pages and small print, which means I got to page 3 and gave up. I kept having to tilt the book back and forth to keep the glare off the words. oh for fuck’s sake. I went to archive.org and just downloaded the damn thing. I will read it on the damn Kindle. I am not getting younger, even if i get new glasses, they only last until your eyes change again.  Like everyone else, i’m getting older, blinder, deafer and if i don’t get my ass back on my bicycle i’m gonna have mobility problems as i age. Knowing what i have to do and doing what i have to do are two vastly different things. I have a lot of texts to edit and covers to design and so forth, but left to my own devices it won’t get done.  My eyes will get tired and i will put it aside, i an going to be spending some of my new found wealth paying people to do it for me.  Hopefully i will be able to judge when its worth doing and when its not.

Today i paid my guy in India for some of the work he’s done for me, he does the gross cleanup on text files and then i do the fine tuning.  And i want to keep him on the hook for future work, it was painfully hard to find one guy i could pay to do good work.  And then i reached out to the website guy who did some work for me in the past, but has sort of gone dark, hopefully i won’t have to find a NEW website guy.  My PC guy,  is somewhere in middle america, usually he works on my computer via remote control, but right now we need to replace my harddrive on the PC, so i need to hire a local guy to do that.  I certainly can’t be trusted to do it.  Those are my guys and i am more than happy to keep paying them to save me from myself and the shiny pages.

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